This was on my codependent recovery page:
“Probably because grief is a vessel we use to contain our losses, and when that vessel gets too full we cry, and until we’ve learned how to healthfully grieve and accept the loss of something or someone, the power won’t go away. It doesn’t mean we won’t be sad from time to time, but the difference between laughter from joy and tears from sorrow, is that laughter brings something into our lives where sorrow is the absence of something that once filled us. Sorry but there just isn’t a fair analogy in this picture; it’s almost a punishment for grieving because we couldn’t “get over it”. Of course, this is both my biased and humble opinion, so I’m sorry if this offends anyone.”
That’s all I can see in this is another “get over it” statement. I’m somehow coming to resent my father constantly telling me to “get over it”, and it does deny me the inalienable rights of grieving and working through things in my way and in my time. He did grow up military as a single dad so I can’t truly be mad at him, but I’m starting to see that perhaps working towards “getting over it” is not the goal, but a lie we tell others to rob them of their journey towards understanding, based purely on the fucked up “cultural values” of America. >.>
I have no idea why I have so many deep and sad thoughts today but it is what it is I suppose.