Daily Archives: January 20, 2017

Wicca, Hecate, and Healing

It’s amazing how messages keep affirming, reaffirming, and building upon themselves.

I’m currently working out of a book called “Hands of light; a guide to healing through the human energy field.” One of the messages it talked about what receiving messages for healing, and the only way for that to happen is to connect with our inner child. The vision I had for Samhain came back to me, of the child at the bottom of the well and apologizing to her. Somehow I feel as if I’ve made peace with her… It’s not perfect, but neutral compared to what it use to be. I really wanna know how to play and connect with her more, as my left-mindedness keeps taking over. 


Of course, it also talked about psychology and its role on becoming a healer. As I look up goddesses to connect to in order to strengthen my practice and ground myself more, I stumbled upon Hecate. She is the goddess of crossroads, power, transition, and transformation. Her greatest calling is discipline, encouraging you to surrender something in your life such as an old pattern of thinking or negative habit (which is what my tarot reading told me to do), and embrace the shadow side of yourself! Of course in my grief work I did in fall, it outlined that healing is to “make whole”, which includes accepting the “shadow parts” of ourselves and bringing them back in, versus curing which is to cut something out to make one health again (like a tumor). Many people who align themselves with her experience nightmares or visiting old trauma in their experience, but where I do dream work anyway, I figure I will hold a ritual to connect with her and see what happens. I’ll probably drink my psychic tea too to enhance my chances of dream work… Mugwort is good for that apparently. 


I really do that that all those times I called upon the Goddess in my magick, Hecate was answering. I’ll be doing a tarot reading tonight with some questions in hand that need answering, and see where it goes. 

Nerves & Growth

Dear Ben,

We are 1 wall away from each other. All I hear is the same repetitive statements over and over again, and suddenly I have to acknowledge the growth I’ve made, and the clinical ability to see where you’re stuck.

“They’re so cruel. You’re so cruel. The doctors were so cruel. The staff was so cruel.”

“They made me feel like it’s my fault. I feel like they don’t like me. They made me feel like it’s my fault because they don’t like me.”

Not to mention that standing up for yourself as a person with disabilities is slowly starting to sound like you deserve to be treated better than everyone else on the planet because you’re more disabled than they are… Yes, you’re entitled to more rights and protections than someone able-bodied and neuro-typical, but the fact that you have a disability doesn’t mean everyone has to employ you, everyone has to worship you as opposed to being treated with respect, it doesn’t mean we turn a blind eye when you do something wrong and defend you with a million excuses… Protecting and enabling are 2 different things, and I’m beyond greatful that I’m no longer where I stood only 6 months ago. I see where you operate on a level of trauma from the abuses you endured… Not clearly, but partially.

I now recognize some of those internal messages id say over and over again as you do, and I still have stuff to overcome. This isn’t to say I’m somehow better or more mature, but rather, an exploration piece to acknowledge how I’ve never been annoyed with you before like this, and the only way I can be is because I’ve grown.

I really hope the time comes for you to grow more too, because there is now a limit as to what I’m wiling to tolerate. For now I’m taking my space and walking away in hopes that you don’t tell me anything I’ve overheard, because I’m in no place to listen or empathize. I’m sorry for being so harsh, but honestly I have my limit, and I hope you hit a limit within yourself where you have to say “enough” and switch gears.

I need my space from you today.

A Day of Self Care


I don’t know what it was yesterday but I felt weighed down, heavy, and my soul was just out of sync. I needed a vibrational lift, and set out for exactly that. I walked from my house to Lee initially to shop at misty meadows when Henry, one of my regulars at work, spotted me and pulled over. He gave me a lift there which was awesome, since I actually put that energy into the universe. Before I left I told myself I wasn’t gonna hitch hike, but someone whose given me a ride before would pull over without my asking, and it happened. 


When I got to misty meadows I was 30 minutes early before they opened the shop, so they were kind enough to let me sit in the learning center till the shop opened. They had 2 cats, and one of them was named Freya after the old Norse goddess. Funny enough I had been doing research on her the day before, trying to figure out what godesses I connect with most and why… She was one of them. It may be a sign. Hecate is the #1 goddess I connect with however and believe she oversaw my tarot reading for 2017 review (more on that later). 

Once the shop finally opened I spent a good hour there. It’s small, but there’s a ton too it. There dozens of teas with herbs they grew themselves, bulk herbs, an apocathery, a reiki studio in the back, and a metaphysical shop in the second half. I got all the candles I’d needed and set out for, as well as a new smudge wand, a book on herb magic, and something called “psychic tea”. I read that it had cayenne and peppermint and had to smell it. It was amazing! I bought half an ounce and was warned by the apothecary that there’s mugwort in it, which causes some vivid dreams. Considering I write all my dreams down there is no way I could pass this opportunity up! Muslin tea bag cloths were only .40 a piece, so I finally have the best bag I could get for my loose leaf teas! Very happy about that.


I made the hour and a half trek back home to my house, and in total I got a little more than 5 miles of walking in. I was hungry and getting a headache, but after feeling so uplifted at the shop, I settled on cleaning my bedroom and organizing my magic tools to relax a little deeper. 

From there I walked downtown, bought a sub for lunch, and a single rose with a sprig of eucalyptus from next door! Green houses and floral shops always do me a world of good. 

By the time I got home and ate, I had 45 minutes before kiddo got off the bus and the stresses of life returned. I had hoped to do a magic ceremony but didn’t want too with Syrus up, as has been the case lately. I did however treat myself to a peppermint everything shower (short of the shampoo). I love love LOVE peppermint!