Allowed to be Angry

In full swing I have been pissed at Kylie, and rather than possibly projecting my inner child onto her, I'm not allowing guilt to conflict with my ability to utilize my anger as a tool for boundary setting. I made it absolutely clear that if she's comfortable trashing the kitchen floor so everyone has to [...]

Advertisements

Dropping Tears of Rage to the Floor

My dream starts off in a dim cafeteria that only has small windows towards the top of the double story ceiling to provide any light; I'm volunteering through hannaford by servicing people in need when I hear a familiar voice "I wanna see carol, I miss her so much." I'd recognize that pouty voice anywhere [...]

On Spirituality & Self

I suppose the need for control comes from the inability to forgive... If I could forgive, I wouldn't need to have so many walls up... What would it look like to forgive? What would it look like to forgive myself? Forgiveness and "letting go" go hand-in-hand... I don't know what I'm doing or how to [...]

The Thunderstorms of Anger

Anger... It thunders. It's loud, and comes with a torrential downpour. Sometimes there is warning; a rumble in the distance to let you know it's coming, but overall it's a downpour, and it's difficult to control.  The winds of emotion sway the sacred trees of inner wisdom that carry the artistic leaves of presence... I'm [...]

A Slave to Control

I'm either an enabler who can't say anything or a control freak for opening my mouth - that's how I feel. I feel trapped over the stupidest shit, and in the end I know it's because I use control to prevent anger outbursts because that's the defective wall I hide behind versus saying I'm vulnerable, [...]

A Job for Life

I'm at my former place of employment - Yangtze, and I'm begging for a job from Moe. I feel incredibly small... almost half his height; in real life however he's only about 2 or 3 inches taller than me. He seems somewhat kinder and fatter than he use to be, but I don't question it. [...]

Negativity

It started off with my ex. It's fragmented at this point, but I remember being very angry at him. I remember him hitting on me, and my skin crawled. I was on the outside looking in, trying to warn some woman about how bad he was - but she didn't listen. He was manipulative and [...]

Digging in my Closet (Dreams from May)

Hey guys, So I was looking through some old documents on my computer trying to find a phone number, when I had totally forgotten I had a dream folder I started in May, prior to starting this blog. I figured I share them with you. I dont remember the one with my ex, but I [...]

Teachers of Revenge

I'm going to school, and the school itself has changed. It's a fusion of my college and my son's elementary school. Sy has daycare at "our" school now, and its a woman who looks almost the same as his primary teacher, along with a few teachers aids. After I've dropped him off in the classroom [...]