I’d dream of you again

For the first time in ages I found myself dreaming of a forlorn friendship of ages past with no chance of redemption. I don't know why my dreams would draw me back to him, but it was comforting to see him again. Inevitably he stopped talking to me at the end, and I remember holding [...]

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My Second Podcast

I wish I could snag the first podcast off the other app, but it won't let me. I switched too Podbean because it allows for more talk time, easier layout, and it's designed well. From now on my podcast will be through here. My second one was more of a spur of the moment thing [...]

Addiction, blogs, and the mental element

Tired beyond belief in mind, body, and soul, I turn to my primitive mind engaging in old fantasies of the past that I entertained in my youth, consumed by lust, and the need to be loved. There's something about the emotional brain that's amazing and corruptive when left unchecked, but I find it essential at [...]

Differentiating the Demon from the Man (The Succubi Addiction & Codependency Factor)

Today I've had a veil over my eyes - the hypnotic melodia of my sex drive wanting to rear it's tiny little head out, but instead hijacking my imagination and lulling me back to the fantasy of a man I thought I once knew and loved. This is the experience of addiction, chasing the next fantasy [...]

Adventures in EMDR Part 1: The Athame turned on it’s end

I'm drawn to think of Pia Mellody and love addiction.... the process of overusing imagination as a dream world for escape. I'm amazed in truth that Keri was able to take what I thought was a weapon of destruction and use it as a tool of healing so suddenly. The Athame, the magical sword on [...]

The Smallest Connection

To be human is to grieve, because if we grieve we are in touch with the swelling of emotions that make us so complex, the glue that permanently connects the puzzle pieces and fragments that make us human compared to the clinical diagnosis that seeks to pull us to pieces for fragmented labels of understanding. [...]

Who Do I Want To Be

Who do I want to be? The truth is I thought I had it all figured out... Mapped, planned, carefully considered based on "who I am", but I don't know who I am anymore, and as a result, I'm uncertain of who I want to be. I've lost my drive for schooling, and with so [...]

New Moon Ceremony

Last night I conducted a rebirthing spell; considering all the work I've done towards healing it felt appropriate to do so - acknowledge the insights I've gained, what's being cast aside, and where I'm going.... At least, where I hope I'm going.  Closing the ceremony it was a little difficult to ground my energy, but [...]

On Holy Ground

I remember a ceremony we use to do in the church called on holy ground, and is perhaps the basis of community healing and narritive therapy that I know. There was a blanket Miss Elizabeth would provide, and everyone would sit around the blanket, tucked into its warmth and security... Then slowly... One by one... [...]

The Context of Intimacy

I feel like a manipulative asshole! I wasn't trying to BE manipulative, I was just blind to what was going on... Where I have a hard time understanding intimacy apparently, I have to wonder to what degree it exists outside the realms of a romantic relationship - was I asking for too much, or is [...]